The other side of life
March 1, 2011 6 Comments
Yikes! I’ve had 1,000 visitors to my blog today – the busiest day ever. I’d write something really eloquent and interesting about my game, but I’m still overwhelmed by it all and haven’t had a moment to think about it. So I’ll tell you what went on behind the scenes yesterday, while you were all so busy supporting my work. I think you deserve to know exactly what kind of a genius you’re dealing with here.
1. Head for the post office to send a parcel. Insert key in ignition. Turn. Nothing happens. Flat battery.
2. Fear not! I’ve just bought a jump-starter for this very reason. It’s in the trunk. Press trunk release. Nothing happens. Flat battery.
3. Ok, I’ll open it manually. Go to remove key. Ignition switch clings onto it with death-like grip. Flat battery.
4. Oh. I know, I’ll pull down the back seats and climb into the trunk from the front. Where are the seat release toggles? Oh yes, in the trunk. Damn.
5. Maybe I’ll remove the battery and get a charger. Where’s the battery mounted? Ah. I’ll give you one guess.
6. Fish around with a hiking pole until I can reach the jump-starter from between the seats, but it won’t fit through the gap. Extract the cables anyway, noting that they’re 8 feet from the nearest power terminals.
7. Walk into Walmart. Buy booster cables. Return in triumph. Connect them to jump-starter and car. Nothing happens. Voltage drops but nothing else.
8. Return home. Put Air on a G-string on MP3 player. Pour large whisky. Feign a smile.
I fixed it in the end. Turns out there’s a little plunger on the ignition lock that not only releases the key but also resets the anti-theft system that was probably preventing me from starting it. Took me a whole minute. Such is the life of an artificial intelligence researcher – people kept warning me that the machines would take over…